A New Year....

This year started with my heart breaking. I think I could be found in bed with tear stained cheeks and puffy eyes as the year changed from 2010 to 2011. My sweet friend Christy passed away on Dec 30..and I hope to blog more about my feelings later..but it is still too hard. However, upon being asked to speak at her funeral (totally overwhelming and scary for me) I spent the week prior pouring over her life preparing for the tribute. I have known her my whole life and in reflection that week....I began to change. The words that keep ringing through my mind are

'Of things that matter most'.

I have reflected on this thought all month. President Uchtdorf spoke on this exact topic last general conference. His talk is worth reading again. This year I am determined to focus on what matters most. President Uchtdorf breaks it down into 4 easy steps:

1. Focus on your relationship with God: 'As we seek Him, as we learn of his Son, Jesus Christ, as we open our hearts to the influence of the Holy Spirit, our lives become more stable and secure. We experience greater peace, joy and fulfillment as we give our best to live according to God's eternal plan and keep his commandments.'

2. Focus on your relationship with your family: 'No other success can compensate for failure here', we must place high priority on our families.

3. Focus on your relationship with your fellowman: We build these relationships one person at a time by being sensitive to the needs of others, serving them and giving of our time and talents.

4. Focus on your relationship with yourself: May I suggest that you reduce the rush and take a little extra time to get to know yourself better. Walk in nature, watch a sunrise, enjoy God's creations, ponder truths of the restored gospel, and find out what they mean for you personally. Learn to see yourself as Heavenly Father sees you--as His precious daughter or son with divine potential.

This month Paige turns 8. We have talked at length about the importance of baptism and how it is the first step home to her Heavenly Father. I love the innocence of Paige in this picture. If only I had a way of protecting her from all that the world wants to throw at her. I want to lock her up and keep her small and innocent. Knowing I cant lock her up, I will focus on things that matter most and hopefully arm her with the tools she will need. My heart has been broken, but it has also been changed. I am quietly determined to refocus on my relationship with God, my family, my fellowmen and myself.

http://lds.org/general-conference/2010/10/of-things-that-matter-most?lang=eng

Of special note: I used a lot of things that Christy had written in her blog as part of the tribute to her. I loved using her words. I loved reading through her blog. I am also redetermined to get back to blogging and using it as my journal. I will be making my blog private in the next few weeks..if you are interested in dropping by..please send me your email.